I get calls every day from people who are in what is known as “protracted benzo withdrawal.” They are three, four, even five (or more) years off their benzo and still experiencing withdrawal symptoms. They wonder if that’s possible. Yes, it is. But before you freak out, worrying that that means you will suffer for years and years, take heart. Not everyone takes that long to heal, and those that do, rarely suffer all that time. Although healing isn’t linear, those that have a protracted withdrawal usually have windows (times when they feel better, or even normal) and their baseline of symptoms usually gets better every year.)
Benzo withdrawal is really an unfortunate name for what we suffer from. We are long past having “withdrawn” from the drug—we are recovering from the damage the drug caused. We have a syndrome with a vast constellation of symptoms. Some of those symptoms can take a long time to go away. But they do, eventually.
People ask me if there is any way to predict how long they will have symptoms. To my knowledge, there are no symptoms that accurately predict the length of one’s recovery. Tingling doesn’t mean you’ll have a protracted withdrawal any more than having head pressure, or nerve pain, or any other symptom. As with most things benzo, everyone is different. That’s why it is a good idea to not compare your healing to anyone else, even someone on the same drug, same dose, same duration. They don’t have your DNA, or any of the other unique things that make you, you. Your healing will be your healing.
If you are in protracted withdrawal and worried about your symptoms, it is okay to get checked out by a doctor you trust. But if nothing is found, you can rest easy knowing that your symptoms are from the damage the benzos caused and that you are healing. Just because you are years out, doesn’t mean that you won’t heal. You will. Your brain and nervous system will settle down. I know all too well, how hard it can be to hold onto hope that one day, you’ll stop having benzo symptoms. I’ve had to cling to threads of hope so small that they were almost nonexistent. And of course, there were days when I had absolutely no hope. None. Zero. The good news is that we heal, even when we believe that we won’t
I’m now seven years off of the benzo I took, and I’m 14 months past my setback. I’m living my life and looking forward to the future. I’m happier than I’ve been in decades. The symptoms I had that made me wonder if I had developed a histamine problem or some other strange illness have gone away all on their own. I can see now that my setback was purely the results of a fragile nervous system that had become overwhelmed by my intense drive across the country, along with some other stressors.
If you are in protracted withdrawal and you’re weary of the journey, please take some time to rest. Rest your worried mind. Rest your tired body. Take time to stop thinking about your symptoms and focus on something good in your life. Hold onto the hope that you will heal because you will. Remember that what works for early withdrawal, works for protracted withdrawal: eat clean, rest, avoid stress/stressful people, don’t take medications that work on GABA or that will hinder your healing, avoid vitamins and supplements that rev you up, avoid alcohol, sugar, caffeine, and processed foods, use distraction to take your mind off of your symptoms, practice acceptance and gratitude, find ways to be of service, and have a spiritual practice.
Be kind and gentle with yourself—extend compassion to yourself. Make your health your top priority, and know that every day, your body is hard at work healing. You can trust that.
Jennifer, Thank you for a new fantastic post! Dan
I hope this helps someone… I’m 18 months into what has been a colourful withdrawal as my dad died last year. Lots of other family stressors too, which have been unavoidable. I needed to have surgery last week and was really worried about the anaesthetic. However just decided to go for it ( it was to remove a seroma on my back which was the result of breast cancer surgery ). Anyhow…. all OK. No worsening of symptoms.so happy. In fact it’s given me a confidence boost, plus I was able to pray with some people in hospital. Lots of love to everyone … nicki (Birmingham uk).
Thank You for your post . I’m glad your healing is going well ! I’m currently wearing off of klonopin since Sept 2017. Went from 2mg a day , now less than .125. It’s been a struggle , as you know , but i’m doing it!!!! I would like to share with you my analogy i use with my family to help them understand because nothing was really working . Every time i did a cut I would hear “again, just quit already “. No one understood until i told them this : Picture a carpet (me) with a very dark stain(klonopin). You clean it but it takes many times , hard work for the stain to finally disappear( weening). Now the carpet(me) looks great!!! It looks great for a while then all of a sudden the stain ( klonopin) comes back!!!! Then you scrub it again and again , (weening) but the stain keeps coming back!!!! This is the only way my family kind of gets it!!! I know eventually the stain will go away and i will be fine!!!! God is with me the entire way and i will not give up !! Thank you for your support , Joann
Jennifer, are all of your symptoms gone now? Even the tinnitus? I know that you were still experiencing some about a month or two ago.
No, I still Have tinnitus. I doubt It will ever go away I’ve learned to live with it. My other symptoms are quite mild or gone. I’m able to be out and about. Life is good.
One thing I can’t fully grasp is the continued insomnia. I’m 8 months off of 0.5 mg Klonopin and 3mg of Lunesta. Althoug my physical symptoms have gotten better , I still can’t sleep. I can go 2 days with almost no sleep at all and my brain is utterly exhausted, but im not sleepy . Usually by day 3 I’ll get 5 hours of sleep and feel better. However within a few days I start the whole process over and can’t sleep for a couple of days etc….. Does that ever go away and normal sleep actually returns ? What’s worse is you can’t take anything to help with the sleep because really pretty much anything that would help will just aggreviate your symptoms. Thanks for listening , your blogs and overall information is great !!!
One thing I can’t quite grasp is the continued insomnia . I’m 8 months off and am literally never sleepy , my brain is exhausted and craving sleep but I just can’t go to sleep. Does this part ever go away ? Even after a few days of not sleeping you would think you would be sleepy , but that is just not the case. Eventually I do fall asleep for 5 hours for a few nights in a row, but then I just start the whole process over and over. To make it worse anything you might want to take to help with the sleep is just going to aggreviate your symptoms . Sleep helps so much with my symptoms, but I just can’t sleep.
Sleep can be one of the last thing that returns to normal for some people. But it does return. My sleep now is deep and restorative. I’m sleeping better now than the years I was On the medication. Hang in there. It will get better. Find ways to cope on the sleepless nights. I did A ton of word puzzles. And I often just laid still and rested as best as I could. Hopefully you’ll see an improvement in your sleep very soon.
Jennifer I’m wondering about someone who was in high doses xanax for 6 years , 10 mgs a day , ct 3 years ago , tried to suicide by massive psych drug overdose , been put back on Valium 3 years ago has failed 22 times to get off , that’s updosed 22 times , suicidal every single day , so depressed that cannot shower , been diagnosed with psychosis and lives by themselves without a friend in the the world and now has the IQ of a 4 y o , scared shitless to leave the house, scared of butterflies and such bad dr/dp that isn’t one bit connected to the world in any way , what hope do I have ?
I’m so sorry that you’re suffering so much. But the always hope. Make the decision to taper and stick with it. You can get free. It may be scary, but you CAN do it. Many of us have. You’ll recover. Many of us had your symptoms. And now we are out in the world, happy. You will be as well. Hopefully you can find a benzo educated doctor who can be of help. We are here for you!