Every person contemplates existence, but pondering can turn into paranoia and panic while in the throes of benzo withdrawal. Questions and concerns about the meaning of life, death, existence, who we are, time, the universe, and our souls, can torment us. Existential angst is a prevalent symptom during benzo withdrawal. It can feel like torture to go down a rabbit hole of questioning reality, existence, God, etc. As I’ve shared so often, “state drives story.” A nervous system damaged by a benzo will usually be in a “protect” state. In the protect state, the content of our thoughts and feelings will be negative, even fearful, fertile ground for existential thoughts to fester and grow. Your existential fear is normal in the protect state, and in benzo withdrawal.
What can we do to manage our existential thoughts and feelings? Here are a few suggestions.
- Know that your fears about reality, your existence, time, God, etc., are common symptoms of benzo withdrawal. They do not indicate a mental illness, a lack of healing, or an inability to heal. They indicate a hyper-excited nervous system, nothing more.
- Meditate, pray, chant, or sing. These activities help regulate the threat detection circuitry and can turn down the volume of existential angst. (If prayer triggers angst, try chanting or singing.)
- Distraction is a coping mechanism for almost every benzo withdrawal symptom. Do your best to take your mind off your frightening or depressing thoughts. Get your hands busy. It helps.
- Bring some humor into your day, if possible. Laughter is good medicine.
- Talk to someone who is understanding and compassionate. It’s helpful if the person has gone through benzo withdrawal and can relate to your emotional pain and can assure you that the existential angst will fade away on its own.
- Practice acceptance. Your nervous system is in a state of dysregulation. It causes uncomfortable thoughts and feelings; however, you are safe, even while experiencing them. Accept that existential angst is part of the healing journey.
- Become a neutral observer. Instead of fighting your existential angst, observe it. Observing helps us know that we are not our thoughts, nor do we need to be afraid of them.
- Hold on to the fact that your existential angst will fade away on its own as your nervous system heals.
- Keep a gratitude journal. Putting your attention on things you are grateful for can reduce your suffering from existential angst.
- Become comfortable with the unknown. No one knows the true meaning of life or what happens after we die. It’s all a big glorious, magnificent mystery. Living in the present moment with an open, loving heart is the best we can do. We are all in this world together. You are not alone.
If you would like daily support as you navigate benzo withdrawal, please consider joining Mornings With Jenn, my group coaching/support group. We meet on Discord. I am live Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 9 AM Pacific for group coaching. Within the Mornings With Jenn server are categories for all-things-benzos, relaxation, fun, the four cornerstones of well-being, and learning. You can turn off the benzo content if you are easily triggered. Mornings With Jenn also has a databank of symptoms you can access with a quick command to help you feel more at ease with what you are experiencing. We have watch parties, educational programs, guest speakers, and more! The cost is $120 a month for 9+ hours of group coaching and all the other benefits. Mornings With Jenn also has memberships for caregivers so they can learn the best practices for caring for their loved one and learn how to best take care of themselves. The cost is $60 a month, which includes weekly group coaching at 9 AM Pacific on Tuesdays.
Thanks Jenn for the positivity, Im 25 months out and i am tired of these brain tingling sensations it has ruined me as a person and my marriage. It has improved tremendously but my patience with it is very thin because it puts me into fear mode once I get into a wave. Your blog has been really helpful but i thought my nerves would of been healed by now. I have been praying to the creator and trying to have faith but my emotions really get the best of me & im tired. Fear is my biggest issue with this. I may need to read back through your older posts & continue to pray because right now this situation makes me look like a horrible person to my husband & others.
Hi Jenn,
I have seen the videos you have taken part in on YouTube and have been very uplifted and inspired by then, and am very interested in joining your program. I am new to tapering, but feel I have been in tolerance for some time. As I live alone I find some of the withdrawel symptoms distressing and difficult to deal with. I know I need more support and connection with others going through the same thing. I live in the UK so the coaching sessions would be in the evening for me but that is OK with me. I am fairly familiar with Discord, though not the other app you mentioned. Do I need to book a one to one session with you or can I just join the program directly? With thanks.
I’m wondering about how many people are in the morning coaching groups. Is there a theme each time or week that leads the session? Or is it casual laidback chatting? Thank you. I’m interested, but would like to make sure it’s a good fit for me.
We have about 60 people in the group. It’s a very unique group that meets on Discord and has some educational courses on Kajabi. There is group coaching three times a week for benzo sufferers, and once a week for caregivers. We offer free yoga classes, streaming music, movie nights, and more! There is content for education and discussion about the four cornerstones of well-being, as well as benzo symptoms and best practices for coping. If you are easily triggered, you can turn off the benzo content so you don’t see it and turn it back on when you are ready. We have fun channels, relaxing channels, meditation, etc. One of the best features, I think, is the symptom database. You can type in the symptom you are concerned about and get information and links to help you cope. We keep benzo talk to the benzo channels so the group is safe and positive. You can have virtual lunch with other members or call them directly through Discord. We are a supportive community. The live sessions are recorded so you can watch them at your leisure if you can’t attend.
Mike, sorry for my tardy response. Feel free to book a coaching session and/or join the support group. You can do either without asking. I’m happy to help.