It’s getting better all the time. A little better all the time. I have to admit…. its getting better….
It’s a joy to know that life can be good again. So glad to be out of the nightmare of the last wave. It was incredibly hard. It was good to know that others got hit that far out though and got better. That’s what I am experiencing too.
My body is still healing, and I have to take it easy, no trips to the gym yet, but overall, I am back to being Dr. Jenn, and loving every second of it. My new website is up and I have a free ebook giveaway that I am thrilled to put into people’s hands. I may have shared the story, The Invitation, here, ages ago. I wrote it in 2005, and knew that one day it would have a purpose. I included twenty questions to help people think about how they can change for the better. Of course, you can’t do that kind of work in withdrawal, you simply don’t have enough working GABA receptors to keep you on an even keel. So I’m encouraging you to NOT try to do any of the work if you download the story. Your job right now is to hold on and heal. Being grateful for your healing is enough emotional work for anyone recovering from the brain damage from benzos.
I’ll still be posting my progress here. But I am spending MOST of my time on my other website. I’m blogging and writing a new book. (My 6th!) I am sharing the gifts God gave to me in the garden. As much as I hated benzo withdrawal, I am deeply grateful for the gifts it gave me. All the crap I used to think was so important in life was stripped away, and I was left whole and polished. It was a painful process, but when is birth or growth ever not painful?
Even though I am busy again with my career, I make the time to read every email. If you are struggling and need to vent or need to receive some hope, drop me a line. my public email is jennifer at injennifersgarden dot com.
If you are struggling with the mental symptoms… you know, the anxiety, confusion, intrusive thoughts, looping thoughts, depression…or that horrible feeling that you are losing your mind and going crazy, remember that it is caused by the changes in your brain from the medication. Your brain is working hard to restore itself. Give it time. Some of us take longer than others, but we all arrive at the finish line.
I know it’s an up, down, sideways journey (look at my healing…. all over the map!) so don’t let it get your down. Reach out to someone who understands the healing process and get reassurance.
Blessings to you all from my garden.