Coming Up For Air

Coming Up For Air

I’ve always been an over-achiever. Maybe it’s just my DNA—the drive to push, push, push to get things done. Or, maybe, it’s a reaction to my childhood trauma driving me to get everything done, and done well (perfectly?) as quickly as possible....
Is It In Your Head?

Is It In Your Head?

I don’t mean “Are you imagining it!” I mean it literally. Do you have withdrawal symptoms in your head? Boy, I sure did! And they can be really scary. Let’s take a look at some of the “usual suspects” so we can not be afraid of...
When Hope Fades

When Hope Fades

I thought it would be so easy. Happy hour had become a habit over the years, in part fueled by interdose withdrawal from the clonazepam I took as prescribed. I didn’t correlate the buzzing and burning inside of my chest, or the increased pulse, or...
Do You See What I See?

Do You See What I See?

Good timing. Winter is my favorite time of the year. Life slows down and we turn toward each other as the holidays come into view. Every year I fixate on one Christmas carol, humming it over and over. This year, it was “Do You Hear What I Hear?” sung by...
Coping With Triggers.

Coping With Triggers.

At first, I had no clue. Even though my taper was fairly brutal from the get-go, I didn’t understand triggers. Not at first, anyway. I remember reading a post from a woman on a benzo website who was nine months out and suffering from a lot of triggers. She wrote...
Coping With Intrusive Thoughts

Coping With Intrusive Thoughts

*Warning, this post could be triggering for some.   The day I lost my mind. I can’t recall the exact day. Was I just home from the hospital after my cold-turkey, or was it before I was carried into the emergency room and admitted? No matter. What I do...